Keep calm and place more blocks.

Sometime, I daresay in the not-so-distant future,

 my (more than likely adolescent) son will throw the

"You don't ever do anything for me" line at me.

I'm ready.

I'll throw back the

"Do you know exactly little square blocks of chocolate cake I cut up and iced to make

that Minecraft cake for your 11th birthday?"

Admittedly, that might be only after the

 "Do you know what trauma and irreparable damage my pelvic floor 

and nether regions went through giving birth to you?" line

(though Mr Boozle and I are currently negotiating at what age my offspring

need to be before I use that for the less than moral use of emotional blackmail).

But it will be a close call.

Because they were both excruciating.

One day, I might get over the trauma of natural childbirth 

but I will never get over icing all those bloody cake blocks .

Nailed it!..No, I really mean it. I nailed that sucker.

You know those photos you see on the web?

Those postcards where they show a pic of the outcome of a really cool recipe 

or fantabulous crafty project 

or awesome science experiment on one half

while the other half displays a photo of the disastrous attempt 

by one of us mere mortals to replicate it

with "Nailed It" in  what is obviously the most sarcastic font

emblazoned across it?

We all laugh (well, I know that I do)

but it is a nervous, sympathetic laugh knowing that one day it could be your cooking 

or sewing or slime-making experiment that is a dismal failure.

I do suspect that some of those glorious projects

have been doctored or photoshopped or the like

so we have no, no, no hope of emulating those achievements.

The home economics equivalent of models in fashion magazines.

So while I was really excited about finally trying to emulate that rainbow cake

that turns up on every corner of the world wide web.

I was also a slightly bit (read that as really) petrified and had a backup plan 

of less impressive but hopefuly less stressful rainbow cupcakes.

It turns out that the biggest fear to overcome is that of copious amounts

of artifical colouring at a little girl's birthday party

but hey, a rainbow is a rainbow after all.

Time-consuming, yes, but totally do-able.

And even a little bit fun.

And, if you can keep the secret,

the cutting of the cake is an awesome surprise to behold.

In the end, even as I fist-pumped the air,

and the birthday girl announced that the cake was "perfect',

I felt like a bit of a fraud for all the adulation that I received.

Though I also felt immense relief that my project wouldn't end up on the world wide web

as a total failure.

Not this time round anyhow.